A Little Bit Unsettling

So, someone mentioned to me today that they had been "surfing the internet" and came across some photos of me. WHAT? Yeah, the 365 project. OK. Remember a few months ago when I was going to take a picture every day for a year, the whole time that Stephen's deployed? Well...I quit 95 photos in. But I had my full name on my project.

Anyway, it kind of creeped me out, so I thought I'd google my name and see what came up. This is where I became even more unsettled. On the first page there were links to my bffs' blogs, one because my name was on it and one because I commented and my google id says my whole name. Then there was my FRSA facebook page, I don't care about that, it's completely public and I don't post private info on there. Then an article in which I was quoted (and misidentified) regarding an event for spouses of deployed Soldiers. A couple of reunion.com and identity search type sites were also there. But here's what's really weird...I saw a link with my name among many others so I clicked it. It went to a newsletter for our electric company. Its a coop, but it isn't as though we CHOSE this company to "coop" with. It's the one our apt complex uses. Right there on the "newest member" list was my name. I just think that's weird.

I'm not freaking out, not withdrawing from society, shutting down facebook, trying to get off the grid. But I do wonder how long that would take, to get off the grid. Or if it's even possible at this point. I try to live in such a way that I wouldn't be THAT mortified if my whole life were on the internet. Most days I think I do okay. I don't really think I'm interesting enough to cause much of a stir.

Of course, it's encouraging to know that I'm apparently also a runner who lives in Ohio! ;)

The Biggest Mistake

Watching Army Wives tonight. Not a good idea.

The Damn Calendar

I just keep looking at the calendar. 22 days until I get to see Stephen.  If he gets to go on the date planned. Oh my gosh. 22 days. What happened to all that weight I was going to lose? Ugh. I don't care, though. I'm not harboring any delusions that I will be a swimsuit model. I am drinking only water and an occasional cup of coffee and eating a few calories as I can get away with (still functioning, being healthy-ish!) and hoping my clothes will be just a little looser.

Looked at it again. As though looking at it will make days go by faster. I do think the weekends will go quickly for the next couple.  I'm headed for a wedding in Texas and a retreat to Kansas City, so with any luck those two will go quickly. It's the weekdays that aren't passing quickly enough. Now that the unit I work for has returned there is a lull like no other. The post redeployment lull is horrid.  Soldiers are back so there is no more homecoming to plan, but they've gone on leave so there is no hustle and bustle about the building, either.

Yes, I have a couple of things to do. The newsletter and Volunteer of the Quarter nominations aren't writing themselves. But ack! I don't want to do it! And if I do that today, what'll I do tomorrow? So I'm emailing myself a blog entry because I can't sign on to the blog from here and post it now. I want to just go home. Or better yet to Hawaii!

Thursday and Friday look to be even worse! Training Holidays. So those Soldiers who are here now won't even be here! I feel a couple sick days coming on...

Oh, and the downer of the day...I have to change my password for my Army Knowledge Online account every 150 days. I did it today. I have to do it again before Stephen comes home. That's too long. 

Didja ever...

close your eyes really really tight and wish really really hard for something?

me too.

did it work for you?

me neither.

April 13

Tonight

by Sugarland

If words could make it real
I'd tell you how I feel
Instead I'm waiting here on my knees love
I know how it feels to breathe
With you beside me
I think about it always...

Tonight, tonight, tonight
I'm waiting for,
Waiting for the night
Tonight, tonight, tonight
I'm waiting for,
Waiting for

A lifetime for a day
Would be an even trade
No price I wouldn't pay
For your heart love
I know how it feels to breath
With you beside me
I think about it always...

Tonight, tonight, tonight

I'm waiting for,
Waiting for the night
Tonight, tonight, tonight
I'm waiting for,
Waiting for

Tonight, tonight, tonight
Tonight, tonight, tonight
Tonight, tonight, tonight
Tonight, tonight, tonight,
Tonight, tonight, tonight,
tonight, tonight.

Tonight, tonight, tonight
I'm waiting for,
Waiting for the night
Tonight, tonight, tonight
I'm waiting for,
Waiting for

****

Waiting 4 weeks.

The video is just the photo with the words, but if you want to hear the song, there it is.

One more...

Because this could have been SO CUTE! If it wasn't just a little bit over the top! (in my opinion, of course)

I think the shirt has ACU material cut out and then outlined my daddy is home or something, with a supercute coordinating skirt! and then there's that GIANT bow/ribbon explosion on the poor child's head!

Some Days

I looked at the countdown today. I haven't been because it's been a little bit disheartening. But today I saw this:

201 days, 10 hrs, 35 mins, & 22 secs!

Some days my thoughts are: huh...that's not so bad! Almost in the 100s! That's over 1/3 there!

But some days my thoughts are: TWO HUNDRED DAYS!?! ACK! That's not really what I say. But it's nicer than "sh*t," which is what I say.

I want to cry, but what's that going to help? Some days I do anyway. Even though it doesn't help.

What helps? Wine. But it's 1pm. A Rascall Flatts special DVRd from the TV. That helped until the played some lovey song. But then my friend sent me a link to a website called "Why Did You Buy Me That?" and now I'm laughing my head off and I'm completely distracted! :)

thanks CGB!

http://whydidyoubuymethat.com

Fake Baby

I know you have been waiting all week for this post. I hope it does not disappoint. Here is a little background information so that you will be just as flabbergasted as I am! That's right, I used the word flabbergasted! :)

1. If you've been following along, you know that we have had quite a few ceremonies for Soldiers returning from Iraq. I may have mentioned (read: devoted a whole partial post to it) the sometimes super overcrowdedness of the joint.

2. If you are unfamiliar with the military here's a little lesson: A Battalion Command Sergeant Major is the highest enlisted rank, (with the exception of Sergeant Major of the Army and there is exactly ONE of those). While spouses do not, or should not "wear" their husband's rank, it is kind of important for them to not act like asses and set a bad example for younger/less experienced spouses. Like it or not, sometimes a younger/less experienced spouse will look to a more senior one for guidance about what type of behavior is acceptable at ceremonies.

3. Due to the overcrowdedness, Soldiers ushering people into the ceremonies have asked that people who do not have strollers and are not handicapped or elderly please take a seat on the bleachers on the 2nd or 3rd row or higher.

SO--here it is. One of the Battalion Sergeant Major's spouses proceeded to march herself right into the ceremony in which her husband returned with a stroller containing...a FAKE BABY! It was a ball with a blanket over it. That's right. Instead of just saying, "you know, I got here really early and I'd really like to go ahead and sit on the front row (even though my husband will be right out front of the group where the BN CSMs stand, and I won't have to search for him like many spouses will) so I'm going to do so," she decided to allow her children (10ish and 8ish) to SEE her straight up lying to flout the rules and get her way.

It is not as though anyone could have or would have physically removed her. She went to EVERY ceremony, so she knows that people sat on the front row without strollers. She just wanted to try to make a point. I've never seen such selfishness. Can you BELIEVE that!??!?

Incidentally, she is the same one who doesn't like that the chaplain ends his prayer with "In the name of the one who has and always will sustain us" --So she shouts "PRAISE THE LORD!"

Which would be totally fine if she was truly praising God. But she isn't. She is trying to make a point to the chaplain who she tried to tell how to pray.

REALLY?!?!?! Ugh.

Sardines/Mission Banner

Imma go ahead and make this just one post with several topics. And while it's not in the title, imma start with the slang "imma". I am not one who likes incorrect spelling or use of "text speak" in regular correspondence. I don't even care for text speak in text messages.

Urban dictionary says: Used in place of "I am going to..." Technically should be spelled i'mma but since this is a shortened version, we leave out the apostrophe!

and "imma", when used, implies either redneck blood, or an idiot.

At any rate, I have a love/hate relationship with this term. I guess the little bit of redneck idiot in me just can't help but love saying "Imma move on to the next topic."

Sardines. We are packed in that building we have the redeployment ceremonies in like sardines. For the smaller groups, 100-150 Soldiers, it's not so bad. But it starts to get pretty packed after that, and as more and more Soldiers came home, more and more came to the ceremonies to see their friends return. The second to last one, Wednesday night, was ridiculous. People wall to wall, and people standing in front of people who got there early enough to get seats. It was terrible! Tomorrow is the very last one. AND it has the colonel and command sergeant major. So although the # of Soldiers returning is a slight 100, the fact that 2600+ are already back, VIPs will want to be there to see the return of the COL/CSM, and its at a decent hour on a weekend...I fear we might be in the roll top can! But at least it is the VERY LAST ONE! Yaye!!

Last comment for today...a few ceremonies ago a lady had a banner that I thought was pretty cute. But pretty cute for putting up in our home. Not so much holding high in a ceremony also being attended by a few hundred people including elderly people and children. It said:

SPC Something

Your Next Mission

OPERATION GET NAKED!

and was held by a woman with a tshirt that read something like: it's about time you got back, now take care of your wife. ---something like that.

Cute, funny, clever? Yes, but not appropriate in that setting. In my opinion and that of many others who commented to me about it.

ok, I've saved the best for last. Tomorrow...FAKE BABY!

Redeployment Wardrobe

So, let's start with the word "Redeployment". Yes, I know it sounds like they are leaving again. It doesn't mean that. It means they are coming home from a deployment.

Now, on with the topic at hand. The wardrobe. They all do it. I'll do it. One told me she changed clothes 10 times trying to find the "right" outfit. This was days before the actual return because that would be disastrous on the DAY OF! There would need to be another shower, hair doing and makeup application! The spouse of our highest ranking officer in the unit said today she might see about finding a new top. She's done this MANY times. You just want to look your VERY best the first time you see him since R&R. It's a big deal and I get that. It will be a big deal to me.

What I don't get is wanting him (and the other few hundred people there to see your boobs before you can even get him home! These are relatively mild examples.

And this one's sporting boobs AND some serious Gothic attire w

ith her Goth friend!

Save the bra for the house!

Also, please do not wear your pajamas!

Yes, I know that this is a child. But she is too old to be wearing pajamas in public, and this ceremony was not in the middle of the night (it was at night, but not the middle of the night. She wasn't asleep and then dragged out of bed to attend.)

This photo will be important in a later post.

Some other very troubling things I saw, I am sure are on display on babies around the world at other times, but I haven't seen this many babies in this short a time...maybe ever!

Your child is beautiful. STOP distracting people with giant bows, puffs and wads of tulle and Army Combat Uniform material!

Ok, that's the end of the wardrobe rant.

I, of course, will be wearing the perfect outfit in October! :)

PS-I love this little one's outfit. There are a lot of kids dressed like this. I like it. :)

So Many Posts...So Little Time

I'm not eating right. I'm not sleeping right. But what I witness daily is exactly right. Today, 227 Soldiers came home to their families and friends. This was the 10th ceremony in 16 days. Saturday is the very last one. I cannot wait to sleep normal hours again. I cannot wait to go to the grocery store and start eating right so that I can wear something in Hawaii besides a moomoo! There are a lot of posts I've wanted to make over the past couple weeks. I hope to do that this weekend.

From my living room in my pajamas! :)

Posts to look forward to:

Fake Baby

Sardines

Mission Banner

Redeployment Wardrobe

okay, falling asleep writing this. see you soon.

Regarding Completely Dependent Spouse

I'd like to correct something here. I posted about some spouses I've been encountering, and this was one:

-Completely dependent. She speaks very little English, has no drivers license, and expects someone to pick her and her 3 children up and find some car seats for them, and transport them to the welcome home ceremony. What?!

This was what I was led to believe about one of our spouses. Turns out, she is from the Philippines, and is much more fluent in English than the person who has been her link to the Army throughout this deployment (a very nice, but very busy lady whose first language is Spanish and who is constantly volunteering for things and not following through). And no, she doesn't have a driver's license, but I'm not convinced that she doesn't have one in her country, or maybe she doesn't need one there. She DOES have car seats, but they are in storage and she didn't bring the ones she had been using at her family's house because she believed that she could get to her things in storage when she arrived to Fort Riley and that's not the case. She also never expected anyone to take her to the ceremony, the no-follow-through (NFL) spouse told her she would LOVE to take her and her kids and then decided that wasn't convenient for her and asked the FRG Leader to do it or figure out how to make it happen.

WELL, I had the honor of spending several hours on two separate days to work this out. It doesn't technically fall in my job description, but it needed to be taken care of, she lives RIGHT by me, it really was a no-brainer. I took her and her 2, 4 and 6 yr old boys to the ceremony in my car using the NFL spouse's car seats (on loan). This is one of the highlights of this redeployment for me. She was so sincerely grateful. Her boys were dressed in button up shirts with ties and sweater vests and she in a nice dress, very attractive but not slutty and not inappropriate AT all (some people don't make good decisions when choosing an outfit for their husband's return). She was ready when I arrived even though I was suppose to collect her at 10:30am, but we got a change of time at 3am and I called her at 8am to say I needed to pick her up at 9am. She was obviously very nervous when I told her I would be there in an hour, she was concerned she couldn't get everyone ready. But she worked it out.

All the way there we visited about the Army and military spouse life. She and her husband are going to Germany from here, to Heidelberg, just down the road from where we were in Mannheim. She told me all about the Philippines and we were in agreement in our dislike for Kansas weather.

At the ceremony she cried, the boys cried, the Soldier cried, I cried. Her Soldier was so glad she was there, but never in a million years expected people to go out of their way and make it happen. Everyone was happy. It was a good day to be an FRSA.

FRSA=Family Readiness Support Assistant. For those who aren't following along. :)